Are Panic Attacks Upsetting You, or Someone You Love?
Posted: Thursday, January 25, 2007
by Dr Jeannette Kavanagh
Dr Jeannette Kavanagh and Daughter
Strategies to manage anxiety and panic attacks
Many of my counselling clients and some of my readers have told me from time to time, that one of the most upsetting aspects of their anxiety is that they can't seem to turn off the negative thoughts.
The anxiety and panic attack cycle
I've written about that in my article 'The Truth about Panic Attacks' which you can find on this website. In that article, you can read a longer explanation of how people can, and do, become part of their own panic cycle. That involvement is totally inadvertent. It happens automatically without any conscious effort.
Those of you who experience high levels of anxiety and particularly those of you who have episodes of panic, terror, disabling fear in a variety of situations will know exactly what I mean. There you are in the queue at the supermarket checkout, or you're happily driving along on the freeway to get home from work and WHAM! out of the blue, your pulse races, your tummy churns, you feel so terrified you may as well be facing a firing squad. It's particularly upsetting for clients of mine who have managed their anxiety and panic for years when suddenly all the old terrifying symptoms return.
As they sometimes do.
If I've been working with someone to overcome their anxiety problems I always focus with them on ways to manage any symtoms when and if they dare to stick their ugly little head into their lives. I never, ever, talk about a cure. Anxiety although very upsetting and even disabling is an emotional response that's inappropriate to a situation or situations. It's not a disease that can or needs to be cured as in eliminated. Just as I help people to respond to situations which make them angry, I think it's much more helpful to focus on ways to help people respond to any circumstance in which they feel anxious. For instance, many of my coaching clients are cooler than cucumbers - except when they have to speak in public. That includes a number of politicians. They don't see themselves as having anxiety issues and nor do they - except with public speaking. However, they still need strategies to get them through the situations in which they feel afraid, nervous, terrified and panic stricken.
My most successful strategy to manage panic
OK. In this e-zine, I can't go into all the details I explore in my counselling sessions and in my self-help kit Calming Words. Basically, my clients have found it useful to well, the best way to describe it is 'to talk to their fear' .
Weird? Maybe. Let's explain. You're driving along and feel a fluttering of mild anxiety. What do you do? Relax. Pass if off? No. If you're attuned and in the habit of feeling anxious, you immediately increase that fear. You don't mean to do that, but that's what you do. You immediately and automatically start thinking:
" Oh no. I'm going to have another panic attack, another attack of anxiety !"
And guess what? That's exactly what you do. The first little flutter of anxiety grows until you're again in familiar territory. You're in the middle of another panic attack.
Here's a better way to greet the first flutter.
Speak to it. Along the lines suggested decades ago by the great and compassionate Australian GP, Claire Weekes. Say any combination of the following:
" Oh it's you again. I know you. You're my overactive panic button. My mind has switched you on when there's no good reason. Now you're trying to pump adrenaline into my system to get me out of a dangerous situation. But look. I've been to see Dr Kavanagh and I now know that you're just an inappropriate feeling. And guess what, you silly feeling. You don't scare me. I welcome you into my life, because each time you visit me, I'm just going to look at you, and watch you disappear.
You're used to me getting upset because you've started a little adrenaline rush. But I'm not playing your game anymore. Feelings can't hurt me. The only way you'll grow into total panic, is if I let you. And I'm not doing that. Watch me now. I'm feeling you in my tummy, but I'm breathing in deeply, and breathing out deeply. Each time you visit, I'm going to time how long you want to stay. Soon you'll get tired of your silly game. In the meantime, Jeannette is out there holding my hand and I can feel you zooming off ."
You get the message. Let me know if that has been of use. Write to me at jeannette@calmingwords.com to ask any other questions about your anxiety or that of a friend or family member. And remember. Only wonderfully creative, imaginative and intelligent people are visited in this way.
This Article has been viewed 1,157 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)Howdy Doc, I gave my friend your article to read, and he is at the present time suffering from panic attacks. The classic heart palpations, his extremities are tingling, and his stress levels soars when he gets this way. He hasn't gotten to the Hyper ventalation stages yet, but if he keeps this up, he will!!! His doctor told him to stop researching every little thing he feels that he thinks is not right with his body, for example, I will sit there at work, and watch him, out of the blue, check his pulse. He will sit there for awhile, and think about it, then he gets up, and goes to a computer, and googles Pulse rates, or "Elevated pulse rates, and what does it mean", I mean, he is pretty much out of control. and its all because of stress of what is going on, rather what he "thinks" is going on with his body....I told him to go take Bio Feedback, he needs it...and also gave him your article....I sure hope it helps him, he is a good kid, and I would like to see him get this under control......Thanks for a great article, Your fan, and friend in pen......Gary.Hello again Gary,Last time I wrote to you it was about your wonderful article Men are from....wherever.Has your friend downloaded my free MP3 Relax on Cue - it's on my calmingwords site. it's 13Mb so takes a while to download. It's part of the calming words kit which I developed to help people who either can't get to counsellors - once you leave the main Cities in Australia, forget it for health services. It's also for people to use to augment therapy they're getting and/or to understand what's happening to (in your case) a friend, or a child or spouse.The idea behind Relax on Cue is quite simple and well tested. Your friend is guided by me to a state of total relaxation - hope the Aussie accent doesn't put him off. Once he's relaxed, he uses a physical cue - I suggest making a circle with his thumb and middle finger but some of my clients make up their own. The idea is that you make that circle, think 'relax' and later it becomes a cue or reminder from your subconscious mind to re-enter that state. It doesn't work immediately but at the end of six weeks absolute maximum, that cue should be a useful tool for when your friend becomes agitated.It is very common for people who have hyper levels of anxiety to be also hyper-vigilant about their bodies - checking their pulse is only part of it. It can become a habit which is difficult to break. If your friend likes, I can send him a chapter from the Calming Words kit which may help him to see how he is the creator of his anxious responses but he is also his own solution. Most of my clients over the years who have problems with anxiety and even agoraphobia or panic attacks - most of them have been very sensitive, creative and intelligent people. Those gifts ironically make them great friends and lovely people, but their imagination and creativity can work against them.
Hello Jeannette, (I hope you didn't mind me calling you "Doc" as it is meant in endearing tones....appreciate you telling me about the site, I will send this to him, and tell him to look at your site....he is in those dreadful "beginnings" of anxiety attacks, where one is thinking he is having a heart attack, rapid pulse. I have been there after a divorce, which by the way, was not a hostile divorce. So why would I have anxiety problems? Who Knows......but I suffered from those for about 3 or 4 years. Bio Feedback brought me back to what I considered my norm.....Thanks again for your help, I will forward to him....your fan, and friend in pen.....Gary.I don't take offence at very much - especially not being called Doc. I work sometimes with final year High School students and they always call me Doc or JK.Bio feedback is brilliant - the body and mind are so often presented as separate, quite a silly notion. Our mind is our most powerful friend, though sometimes it causes us a few problems. I don't like the term anxiety disorder because quite often it's a temporary reaction and quite appropriate. We're not robots. However, it does sound as if your friend needs help to calm down and realise that he is not physically ill. Speaking of which, it is a good idea to have a medical check-up to make sure that the palpitations don't have a physical base.
I will definitely try these strategies- I have a good feeling about their proficiency- I'll let you know how they worked out for me- Thanks so much- Always- Ella
We want your comments! If you can read this, you don't have javascript enabled, so you can't use this comment system. Please enable javascript.